When Was the Last Time You Listened? By Eloho Tietie
Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling heard and like your voice mattered? That’s because someone listened.
We’re often told to speak up, make our voices count, and air our opinions. But there’s an overlooked skill in communication: listening.
Listening is essential in business meetings, negotiating strategic projects, romantic relationships, parenting, and spirituality. It offers us the opportunity to gain fresh insights and perspectives and move away from our blind spots.
What Does It Mean to Listen?
Active listening is a communication skill that involves paying attention to the speaker’s words and body language, asking clarifying questions, and summarizing what you’ve heard. It’s about more than just hearing the words; it’s about understanding the speaker’s message and feelings.
According to a Harvard Business Review article, active listening is made up of three components:
- Cognitive listening: This is the ability to pay attention to all the details of the information being discussed, both implicit and explicit.
- Emotional listening: This is the ability to stay calm and receptive, even if you disagree with the speaker.
- Behavioral listening: This is the ability to use nonverbal cues, such as eye contact and nodding, to show that you’re listening.
How to Be a Better Listener
Being a good listener is a skill that takes practice, but ultimately rewarding. Here are a few tips to help you improve your listening skills:
- Keep an open mind. When you listen with an open mind, you’re more likely to understand the speaker’s perspective. Try to avoid making assumptions or judgments.
- Practice empathy. Empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. When you practice empathy, you’re more likely to understand how the speaker is feeling.
- Be curious. Ask questions to show that you’re interested in what the speaker is saying. This will help you to better understand their message.
- Stay attentive. Avoid distractions such as your phone or computer. Make eye contact and nod your head to show that you’re listening.
- Avoid rehearsing your response. Take a moment to reflect on what the speaker has said before you respond. This will help you to avoid misunderstandings.
- Accept and recognize your shortcomings. Everyone makes mistakes. If you find yourself not listening well, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just learn from the experience and try to do better next time.
The Benefits of Listening
Listening is a powerful communication skill that can have many benefits, including:
- Improved relationships. When you listen to others, you build trust and rapport. This can lead to stronger relationships in your personal and professional life.
- Better decision-making. When you listen to all sides of an issue, you’re better equipped to make informed decisions.
- Increased productivity. When you listen to your team members, you can identify and address any problems that may be affecting their productivity.
- Reduced stress. When you feel heard and understood, you’re less likely to feel stressed or anxious.
- Greater self-awareness. When you listen to yourself, you can learn more about your thoughts, feelings, and needs.
Listening is a skill that is essential for success in all areas of life. By practicing the tips above, you can become a better listener and reap the many benefits that come with it.
So next time you’re in a conversation, remember to listen.
The opinions expressed in this publication are those of the authors. They do not represent the opinions or views of Osun Defender
